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On Your Own (Laser 7)

by Astpai

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1.
On Your Own 04:33
i still remember the warm smiles, we were tiny steps away from shaking hands. A: "it always depends on what you REALLY need this time for your own, on your own" B: „so what's your point again in stabbing backs and wasting time?! 'cause to me it ain't that hard to see, ain't that hard to know i'm fine.“ A: "so you have seen the same..." B: "...and we've seen a lot!" A: "yeah, but i'm still thankful for what i got, while cutting ways ain't shorten time - a cut worth to be redefined" B: "i backed up, i shut down, restarted simulating so many times, still to me it ain't that hard to see, ain't that hard to know i'm fine" words haunting, underlining the last doubts remaining almost silent. i still remember the warm smiles, we were tiny steps away from shaking hands.
2.
it’s hard to find sleep. it’s hard to find sleep on my own. and even at times i wished that someone was around, this kind of company would have been impossible to take - so give me a fucking break! how nice of you to let me take part in this your boring life for the last six hours straight, where both sexist boys and disappointed girls mix up in an explosion, in a cocktail of attention and control, compensation and a bitter taste drenched in alcohol. this i my world against yours. between my cage and your long hallway just thin glass - and i wasn’t even asked. this raging noise coming out of crashing bores’ throats, amplified by extended puberty is nothing but sickening and tiring, but still way too loud to let me drift to sleep.
3.
it’s hard to find sleep. hard enough to find sleep on my own. and now i’m struggling with excitement all alone, wide awake - once again - with so much on my mind and only the sound of wind blowing in and out of snorring bodies to kill the time with. “How come they can put their souls to rest so perfectly fine at what seems to be just the right point in time, without the waking fear of counting one dumb story less (at the break of dawn)?” i think to myself as i take this wounded soldier from your hands to avoid a mess - once again. not to feel stupid talking about our incommon past over and over again feels like the source for the beating in our chests, feels like the fresh wind right beneath our beaten wings - right benath our tired wings. this remains as love for sure! no way in hell this could get any less or more. this will be love forevermore.

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released May 10, 2010

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LaserLife Records Wiener Neustadt, Austria

punk/hc diy-label.

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